Tempers flare at Abuja all female Moot African Union Summit

A moot Assembly of Heads of State and Governments of the African Union was held by Girl Presidents of African countries in a hall at Anglican Girls Grammar School in Abuja, Nigeria’s political capital.

The current Chair of the African Union, Rwanda’s President Paul Kagame, began the session on a cheerful note by quoting the President of the African Development Bank’s statement that the continent’s GDP had grown by three per cent; that Liberia had elected footballer George Weah as their new president in a free and peaceful election; that Zimbabwe and South Africa had used non-violent party rules to depose and chose successors amid song and dance in the streets; and the Mo Ibrahim Foundation had honoured Ellen Johnson Sirleaf by awarding her its Leadership Prize which is worth 5 million American dollars as reward for a commendable record of rebuilding a Liberia torn by civil war, an Ebola epidemic and endemic corruption.

Sparks started flying when Gabon and Ghana reacted to President Donald Trump’s anal insult of Africa. Gabon claimed that forty years of oil exports from Gabon must have turned to ‘’shit’’ only being guzzled inside America; while Ghana asserted angrily that an estimated two million Ghanaian professionals currently in the United States had built, were not defecating on America’s development. Libya joined Gabon in accusing Obama for pouring hundreds of thousands of bombs on Libya, assassinating Muammar Gadaffi as cameras in Euro-American satellites floating over Libya recorded his killing by hired mobs backed by British Special Forces.

Somali started a brawl with Kenya by accusing its leaders of claiming ownership of oil deposits which are on Somalia’s side of their common border on the Indian Ocean. She accused the widespread brewing by Kenya’s troops in Somalia of local vodka – known as ‘’KILL-ME-QUICK’’. It fed drunkenness among Kenya’s soldiers sent to fight Al-Shabaab fanatics allied to the Taliban. Kenya’s president hit back by recalling the over six hundred thousand Somali refugees in Kenya; Somali police planting bombs in Nairobi and killing students in dormitories while blaming it on Al-Shabaab, and failure by Somali intelligence to detect attacks due to their addiction to chewing KHAAT – narcotic leaves – while on duty.

Mauritania urged ECOWAS to reject Morocco’s application for membership; recalling that Morocco had thrown out hundreds of Mauritanian students studying in her universities and colleges following criticism by Mauritania of Morocco’s invasion of Western Sahara. Such a dangerous behaviour could also be extended to Mauritania in the future. She offered Africa more supplies of phosphates to support agriculture with cheap fertiliser.

The president of Mauritius welcomed the election by parliament of Cyril Ramaphosa as South Africa’s new leader, but condemned the collapse in the quality of its education system. She claimed that in a global ranking of education standards among developed countries, South Africa had ranked 75th out of 76 countries. Female teachers were offered jobs only if they met demands for sex by male officials. She advised Ramaphosa to learn from Mauritius and give youths employment by giving them education in schools with high standard classrooms.

The president of Namibia read out reports that in Kenya’s rigged election of August 2017, all votes cast were rejected in 600 polling stations known to be friendly to opposition parties. Also that election results had started arriving into computers at the national election commission one day BEFORE voting officially started. Namibia was willing to train election officials in Kenya if the African Union so wished. ‘’My heart bleeds for Kenya’’, she mourned.

Tanzania’s president boasted about a rise in the level of literacy in her country from 64 per cent in the mid-1970s to 94 per cent in 2012. She called on those joking with democracy to always remember that Mwalimu Nyerere risked lives of Tanzanians by supporting those fighting for freedom against European rulers in Zimbabwe, Mozambique, Namibia, Angola and South Africa. They must sleep and laugh with their brains open to tricks by those Europeans to get back power.

President Mnangagwa of Zimbabwe surprised everyone by praising his former boss Robert Mugabe. Like President Zuma, who stated in an interview with a German newspaper that Mugabe had given his country back to his people; had broken the culture of Europeans being racially superior, and beaten up those white farmers who refused to give back land taken from black people with the use of powers in guns. Mugabe also promoted the value of education, unlike the poor attitude to education among black South Africans. She invited foreign investors to return to Zimbabwe now that Mugabe is out.

The president of Mali condemned killings of people by Fulani who move about with cattle, sheep and goats in Nigeria, Mali and as far downwards as northern Democratic Republic of Congo. She called for a culture of EXCELLENCE in schools. This means that teachers and students must change their attitudes to work and study. Like Tanzania before her, the example of Singapore was of much appeal to her, and should be copied all across Africa.

The Prime Minister of Ethiopia announced his resignation; a decision supported by his ruling coalition and parliament. He blamed mass demonstrations in Oromo region of the country, but did not mention the ‘’State of Emergency’’ which followed his announcement. Like Zuma and Mugabe, she too had been ‘’recalled’’ by those who elected her to office.

More positive news came from Gabon who announced the allocation of ONE BILLION American dollars for the construction of an ‘’African Centre for Space Research’’. The centre would ‘’lift the imagination’’ of Africa’s youth beyond thrills of continental football matches which Gabon had been asked to host on two occasions.

Madagascar and Rwanda congratulated Presidents Ellen Johnson Sirleaf and Muhammadu Buhari for their intervention in Gambia and ensuring that former ‘terror-leader’ Yahya Jammeh ‘’went on vacation in Equatorial Guinea’’. On his part, Buhari saw hands of those opposed to his re-election in 2019 in fuelling attacks by nomadic Fulani livestock herders against farming communities. He was nostalgic about his former tenure as a military ruler during which his ‘’cough would send panic into military administrators of states in Nigeria.’’ In a federal democracy, however, it was now his human right to be abused as a ‘’go slow leader’’. He was glad to have been given the mandate at Addis Ababa by her colleagues to lead Africa’s fight to end corruption and build development.

Journalists from the Pan African News Agency (PANA), Senegal’s Le Soleil, Ethiopian Herald and South Africa’s Mail newspapers announced the start of proceedings and its various stages: notably transitions from formal speeches by Chairpersons of the African Union, African Union Commission; Mauritania, Mali, Eritrea, Malagasy and Nigeria, into what was labelled as a ‘’Peer Review Session’’, another name for critical jabs at records of bad governance in other countries.

Having conducted simulation on 29th January, 2018 at a memorial for late Professor Abubakar Momoh by The Electoral Institute (an affiliate of the Independent National Electoral Commission), and on 31st January, 2018 at a “’Reflection over Mallam Sanusi Abubakar’’, the PAN-AFRICA Group now faced the challenge of animating an audience of their own parents. Parents, who later volunteered comments about the performance, said they were thrilled and openly delighted at this novel educational tool. As one put it, she considered herself ‘’a lucky parent’’ because her daughter was a participant.

The event was also a moment of welcome to a new principal, Estelle Ozigbo; an affirmation of enthusiastic support by Mrs. Fidelis, the Deputy Principal while she served as ‘’Acting Principal’’, and gratitude to Adewumi Adesina, President of the African Development Bank when he was Minister of Agriculture in Goodluck Jonathan’s cabinet. He had god-fathered PAN-AFRICA’s President of Zimbabwe and Senegal when they attended an Africa Youth Forum at Addis Ababa on January 28 and 29, 2014.

The obviously delighted principal exhorted the participants to go forth and ‘’become Presidents of African Countries’’ – giving a new frontier to Pan-Africanism. (Premium Times)



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